The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration. For many, it brings warm memories and cherished traditions. But this time of year can be isolating and overwhelming for those who feel alone or are without family. If you face the holidays with a heavy heart, know that you are not alone, and there are ways to make this season more meaningful and comforting.
At Roots and Branches Therapy, we understand the emotional challenges of the holiday season. Whether you’re physically distant from loved ones, have strained family relationships, or are grieving a loss, this guide offers practical tips to help you navigate the season with resilience and self-compassion.
Acknowledge Your Feelings
Feeling sad, lonely, or disconnected during the holiday is painful. Rather than suppressing these emotions, take a moment to acknowledge and accept them. Journaling can be a helpful way to process your feelings, or you might try mindfulness exercises to sit with your emotions without judgment.
Remember, your emotions are valid. Pain is a signal that something is wrong; something needs to change. Recognizing that is the first step toward creating a plan to care for yourself during this time and how to start building new connections and eventually chosen family in the new year.
Redefine What the Holidays Mean to You
The holidays don’t have to revolve around traditional family gatherings. Here’s your opportunity to redefine what the season means to you. Holidays can simply be vacation time for self-care. Think about activities or rituals that bring you joy and peace. Perhaps it’s watching your favorite movies, decorating your space, or creating a new holiday tradition that reflects your current stage of life. Focusing on what matters most to you, can help you reclaim the holidays as a time of personal growth and comfort.
Connect with Others
Feeling alone during the holidays doesn’t mean you have to stay isolated. Seek out opportunities to connect with others, even if it’s in non-traditional ways. Here are some ideas:
- Reach Out: Do you have friends who are unaware you are alone on holiday? When you share without self-pity or expectation, a little vulnerability can create a connection and perhaps give someone a chance to make a seat for you at their holiday table.
- Attend Community Events: Look for holiday gatherings, charity events, or workshops in your area. These can provide a sense of community and belonging.
- Volunteer: Helping others can be incredibly rewarding. Consider volunteering at a local shelter, food bank, or hospital. Not only does this positively impact, but it is also a great way to connect with other volunteers.
- Foster pets: Give a fuzzy creature a home for the holidays! They will keep you busy, offer cuddles, and bring joy in their antics. Rescue groups need extra foster homes for pets during the holidays because their regular volunteers may be out of town.
- Join a Support Group: Many organizations offer holiday-focused support groups where you can meet people with similar experiences and feelings.
Even virtual connections, such as joining online groups or scheduling video calls with friends, can help you feel more supported.
Practice Self-Care & Plan Your Days
The holidays are a perfect time to prioritize your well-being. When you’re feeling alone, self-care becomes even more essential. Here are a few ideas:
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- Make a Schedule: Create a schedule of all the self-care you plan to engage in during your time off work and be flexible! If taking a walk is on the schedule for 9 am Monday and you just can’t motivate yourself, perhaps you can motivate yourself to do another form of physical activity. Or bargain with yourself, you can make yourself breakfast and prepare dinner for later, and then take a walk during the time you were supposed to be cooking dinner.
- Stay Active: Physical activity, whether yoga, walking, or dancing, can boost your mood and reduce stress. Source: CDC on Physical Activity and Mental Health
- Nourish Yourself: Treat yourself to comforting meals or cook something new you’ve always wanted to experiment with.
- Rest and Recharge: Permit yourself to rest. Ensure you get 8 hours of sleep, but not 10-12. Create a cozy environment, read a good book, or listen to calming music.
- Pleasant Events & Practice Mastery: Learn new skills and perform tasks that give you a sense of accomplishment. Take a minute to appreciate the beauty of a snowfall. Get excited about the delicious bubble bath you are about to take. Even paying a bill, when framed well, feels like excellent adulting!
- Go Easy on the Substances & Other Less Desirable Coping Behaviors: When you are home, without distraction, and feeling sad, it’s easy to resort to unhealthy coping behaviors such as alcohol, substances, cutting, picking, emotional eating, gambling, restricting food, compulsive exercising, binge shopping, or days on the couch watching TV. If you struggle with any behavior you’d like to stop, plan, and list alternative ways to self-soothe or rebel.
Remember, self-care isn’t selfish—it’s vital to maintaining emotional balance.
Take a Solo Trip
Take yourself out of your daily routine and plan a trip. It could be a weeklong getaway exploring a new city or culture or a day trip to hike a new trail. Any opportunity to have an adventure will increase your energy, develop your ability to change and grow (neuroplasticity) and improve your mood (releasing serotonin).
Seek Professional Support
If the holidays feel particularly difficult, reaching out to a therapist can provide valuable support. At Roots and Branches Therapy, we offer a safe and compassionate space to explore your feelings and develop coping strategies. Therapy can help you navigate loneliness, process grief, and build emotional resilience for the future.
Focus on Gratitude
Even in small ways, practicing gratitude can shift your perspective during challenging times. Consider starting a gratitude journal where you write down three things you’re thankful for daily. Gratitude can help you notice the positive aspects of your life, no matter how small they may seem.
Gratitude doesn’t dismiss your feelings of loneliness but instead helps you balance them with moments of appreciation. Source: UC Berkeley on Gratitude and Well-Being
Conclusion: Be your own greatest supporter
The holidays can be challenging for those without family or who feel alone, but they don’t have to be defined by loneliness. By acknowledging your feelings, connecting with others, practicing self-care, and seeking support, you can create a holiday experience that feels meaningful and true to you.
At Roots and Branches Therapy, we are here to support you through this season and beyond. If you’re struggling, don’t hesitate to reach out—we’re honored to be part of your healing journey.
